By Raphael Awen
I believe every last one of us has a cave of deep suffering somewhere in our makeup, somewhere in our souls timeline, that plays out in our lives.
Many are working hard to avoid all contact with this cave while others know it all too well.
Some of us have done serious time in coming to terms with our caves and have found, through trial and error, a way through, and even gone on to transform the cave into a beautiful space of previously unimaginable self love and connection. If there are yet more caves to uncover, we are no longer afraid, nor too deeply surprised to encounter them if and when they arise. I feel this to be true for myself.
Our capacity to know and feel our deepest and truest joy is inextricably connected to our capacity to know and feel our deepest sorrows. It all wants to be known and felt and one cannot be separated from the other.
Finding and feeling a part of you that hates life can be quite a task when there is another above ground part of you quite invested in keeping a surface life that is expected of you intact. But for many now, it is becoming clear that this is the reason why they chose to incarnate here, to find and feel all of what exists in the furthest regions of their being, and to re-member it all to the love that they are.
What we are also realizing is that we can’t do it without help. The steps to our freedom, like the pathways that led into our pain, intertwine us in messy relationship. Until a ‘you’ can emerge that isn’t fused with the pain, and this you can recognize and go on to authorize someone or something outside of yourself to help you, there really isn’t any help to be had.
In another way, any ‘outside’ resource that you engage and authorize is coming from you as they couldn’t have any way of serving you without your authorization, regardless of their claimed expertise or desire to help you. In this way, we rightly project our higher selves onto an other that is our flow of help in the now moment to help us.
But where does ‘help’ come from and what does it look like? How would you know it when you saw it?
Truth is, you can’t really know, at least not in the way a part of you may be seeking a guarantee that the help you are attracted to isn’t in fact a path that will elucidate more of your own deeper suffering through an abusive kind of experience. If there is more suffering to encounter in your being, you can know that it was yours to encounter, and even an experience of abuse was something your higher self was not afraid to encounter and even draw to yourself as it offered you an opportunity to access and heal something that couldn’t be accessed and healed any other way.
Your soul knows that you are love, while you are out seeking to know and feel more of this love that you are.
Your soul is not afraid of the role of momentary pain or sorrow, to backlight this glorious everlasting love into being seen and felt as your daily lived in reality.
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.